General News
NARCISSISM, SUBSTANCE ADDICTION IN HOMES
By Stacey Ukaobasi
There is a dangerous combination destroying families from the inside: narcissism fueled by addiction. On their own, each one is destructive. But when they meet in one person, the result is a silent war that breaks homes, destroys confidence, damages children, and drains the life out of anyone tied to them.
Narcissists do not care who they hurt as long as they get validation from outsiders. They are masters of image.
To the world, they are saints ,kind, generous, supportive, charming.
At home, behind closed doors, they become something else entirely.cold, cruel, dismissive, manipulative, abusive, and emotionally monstrous.
They can give an outsider their last breath just to be praised. They can cry on command, cook up stories, and twist reality to fool their followers. To the public, they are victims. To their families, they are tormentors.
They do not want anyone close to them to succeed. Your success threatens them. They only feel comfortable around people they consider beneath them. They spend their earnings buying validation drinks, gifts, reckless spending while their family suffers. The moment salary enters their hands, they disappear to the streets. Home only matters when their pockets run dry and they need a base to recharge before their next cycle of destruction.
They lie endlessly,stupid lies, unnecessary lies, shameless lies. They miss very important family events, birthdays, milestones, every single family event and responsibilities nomatter how important they are. They will promise to come, give you hope, make you cancel backup plans, then switch off their phone for days. No explanations. No apologies. No accountability. Your pain just does not register at all. They keep their families waiting while they are chilling somewhere drinking and jumping around unbothered.
They lack empathy of any kind. You can be sick, struggling, drowning they will watch from afar until you drag yourself out alone. They isolate when their loved ones are suffering. They disappear and return only when things are calm again. A narcissist can watch you attempt suicide and not lift a finger instead, they record it with their phone not to save you, but to protect themselves.
They are mentally, emotionally, and physically abusive. When you don’t report their abuse, it empowers them. Something in their mind tells them they are right. They twist every story, manipulate everyone around them, and always position themselves as the innocent one. They defend outsiders over their own family because validation from strangers is more important to them than loyalty to those who see their true face.
Their lack of empathy makes their behavior feel inhuman. It goes beyond personality flaws it feels darker than anything you can explain with normal language. Their actions are spiritually empty, morally cold, and emotionally dead. There is no remorse, no conscience, no recognition of the damage they cause. What they do is the product of brokenness, addiction, pride, and deep spiritual blindness. It’s like dealing with someone whose soul has shut down, whose heart no longer responds to love, pain, or responsibility.
There is something inside their brain a twisted sense of entitlement that tells them they are always right. No matter what they do, no matter how wrong, how violent, how cruel, or how destructive, their mind convinces them that they are the victim. They justify every abuse. They excuse every attack. They rewrite every story to make themselves look innocent.
To them, you are the problem.
Your pain is irrelevant.
Your suffering is invisible.
Your voice is noise they want to silence.
They are always in debt. No business with them ends well. Their greed and recklessness destroy partnerships. No matter how much money they earn, it vanishes quickly on alcohol, on women, on the people they seek validation from, never on their responsibilities. They are habitual debtors who leave destruction wherever they go.
Inside their head is constant chaos. They don’t listen, they don’t reason, they don’t compromise. They only hear themselves. For outsiders, they become excellent listeners and problem solvers. But for their loved ones, they shut down completely. 9 is their 6 they create arguments because arguments are their oxygen. They never tire, never give up, never admit wrong. They twist every word you say and turn every detail of your life even from before you were even born into a weapon.
They keep multiple women outside the marriage to punish their wives into submission.They do not love their children,they use their own children as tools, dumping responsibilities that should be shared. They have no emotional connection with their kids,the children simply become collateral damage in their ongoing war for control.
Their public image is spotless. They hug you in front of people, act like they love and respect you, but once the door closes, the mask drops, and the real mask emerges.
What they do is the product of brokenness, addiction, pride, and deep spiritual blindness.
Your tears or pain cannot change a narcissist. Marriage does not soften them. Children do not mature them. Prayers cannot break their behavior. They can only change if they themselves choose to. They learn only the hard way through consequences, loss, or public embarrassment. Real change begins only when they accept their mistakes and genuinely commit to long-term therapy.
The only hope is in THEM admitting that their behavior is abusive, taking responsibility without excuses, their loved ones refusing to tolerate or cover for them, and the narcissist willingly choosing to do the inner work.
Some of them are not evil,they are wounded people with deeply broken identities. But even then, healing must be THEIR decision and not your sacrifice.
*STACEY UKAOBASI is the founder of the FORUM FOR CHILD RIGHTS PROMOTION and is a Nigerian activist based in the United States of America.
General News
Veterinarians crucial to successful agenda on food security, employment -FG
By Abdul-Ganiyy Akanbi,
The Federal Government has said veterinary professionals have a critical role to play in the realization of the present administration’s agenda on food security, wealth creation, employment generation, and national resilience.
Permanent Secretary, Service Policies and Strategies, Office of the Head of the Civil Service of the Federation, Mr. Ishiyaku Mohammed, stated this at the opening of a two-day veterinary leadership summit on Thursday in Abuja meant to find lasting solutions to the challenges confronting Nigeria’s livestock sub-sector.
Mohammed reminded participants that this responsibility rests squarely on their shoulders as professionals, stressing that the success of livestock development initiatives depends largely on their expertise and commitment.
According to him, the Tinubu administration created a separate Ministry of Livestock Development to mitigate the effects of climate change, rising temperatures, desertification, changing rainfall patterns, flooding, and increased competition over natural resources, factors that are significantly altering livestock production systems.
The Permanent Secretary further stated that the Federal Government has set an achievable target of increasing the livestock sector’s contribution to the Gross Domestic Product from the current 32 billion dollars to 74 billion dollars by the year 2035.
He maintained that this target cannot be achieved if the country continues to lose animals to preventable diseases and inefficient production systems.
Mohammed assured that the Federal Government will continue to collaborate closely with professional bodies to ensure that public policies are guided by expert knowledge and aligned with global best practices.
In his welcome address, the President of the Nigerian Veterinary Medical Association, NVMA, and the organiser of the summit, Dr. Moses Arokoyo, said the annual summit is deliberately structured to promote diversity, equity, and inclusiveness, while ensuring that women and young professionals from all regions are empowered to contribute meaningfully to national animal health outcomes.
Arokoyo expressed optimism that the outcome of the two-day summit would strengthen livestock systems, not only in Nigeria but globally.
He noted that disease burden, weak service delivery systems, climate pressures, insecurity, and inequitable access to veterinary services continue to limit the sector’s full potential.
Stakeholders in the livestock sub-sector, including the Veterinary Council of Nigeria, in their separate goodwill messages, emphasized the need for veterinary professionals to work together to complement the Federal Government’s drive for sustainable livestock development.
Representing the Minister of State for Agriculture and Food Security, Senator Sabi Abdullahi, a renowned veterinarian, Dr Lami Lombin commended the leadership of NVMA as he informed the gathering that efforts are in progress to harmonize the veterinary surgeon act and the para animal health professional through a bill .
She challenged veterinarians to rise to the occasion,support themselves in diverse and ensure that the flag of the profession is maintained and raise high
Also, Thembinkosi Ramuthivheli, a Business Development and Engagement Manager and Edith Moroti, Associate Director, Outreach & Partnerships of GALVmed called on veterinarians to fight animal diseases burden in nigeria .The duo called for effective collaboration among the professionals to ensure rapid growth in the industry.
The President of Veterinary Council of Nigeria, Professor Matthew Adamu emphasized the need to give Arokoyo another chance to lead the veterinarians to the promise land as he maintained that is tenure as transformed the profession in the last two years.
He called on states chapter of the NVMA to work assiduously and support the association in the interest of the profession.
General News
FG reaffirms commitment to poultry disease surveillance system
The Federal Government has reaffirmed its commitment to building a modern, integrated and responsive poultry disease surveillance system that will protect farmers, food system and the national economy.
The Chief Veterinary Officer of Nigeria, Dr Anzaku Samuel, stated this in Abuja at the opening of a one-day training for one hundred selected poultry farmers across the 36 states and the Federal Capital Territory, FCT on strengthening private sector poultry laboratories in Nigeria.
Anzaku emphasized that the present administration was embarking on aggressive sensitisation of farmers, having realised that disease remains the single greatest threat to the poultry sector.
He noted that the need for disease surveillance has become imperative to avert outbreaks that affect productivity, feed efficiency, egg output, trade confidence and consumer safety.
According to him, there is a need for more collaboration between the government and the private sector to improve diagnosis turnaround time, so that farmers can receive results quickly enough to make timely management decisions.
Anzaku urged the participants to standardise reporting pathways so that information can flow more effectively, enhancing communication between veterinarians, laboratory diagnosticians and producers, and ensuring that surveillance becomes proactive rather than reactive.
He commended the Global Alliance for Livestock Veterinary Medicine for organising the training, which he said would strengthen the animal health system in Nigeria.
The Country Manager of the Global Alliance for Livestock Veterinary Medicine, Dr Moses Arokoyo, said the essence of the training was to encourage a diagnostic and preventive approach as a major way to tackle diseases and enhance profitability among poultry farmers in the country.
According to him, there should be more collaboration, as data lies with poultry farmers and is needed by the government to have accurate information on the development of the sector.
He, however, appealed to the Federal Government to make import regulations easier and to strengthen the capacity of farmers in rural areas for enhanced productivity.
The Director-General of the Poultry Association of Nigeria, Onalo Akpa, who also identified high production costs as one of the challenges facing farmers, appealed to the government to engage professionals in the livestock and crop sectors to strike a balance between producers of raw materials and livestock farmers in order to check the rising cost of production.
Onalu pointed out that the importation of raw materials is contributing to high production costs, which he said is affecting the economy.
The training provided an opportunity for farmers across the country and other stakeholders in the livestock sector to discuss various challenges hindering poultry development.
General News
Corporate Social Responsibility:Security Outfit Empowers Bayelsa Riverrine Community With Canoes
By David Owei,Bayelsa
As part of its Corporate Social Responsibility, Labrador Security Outfit has empowered four compounds of Olugbobiri community in Southern Ijaw Local Government Area of Bayelsa state with 2 canoes each to support their socio-economic activities.
The coordinator of the pipeline security outfit in Southern Ijaw local government, Dr Levi Seiyefa Wilson said the gesture is part of effort to give back to the people for supporting the protection of crude oil pipeline facilities in the area.
Dr Levi who disclosed this during the thanksgiving service for the promotion of Bishop Uyabara Yousuo to the position of Pope of The Amen Church of God in Olugbobiri Community, said the oldest men in thirteen families across the community also received 50,000 naira cash gift to support their families.
He added that primary and secondary school students who performed excellently in their last examination were given a token of 10,000 and 25,000 naira respectively to encourage them.
Responding to the gesture, Deputy Paramount ruler of Olougbobiri community, Chief J T Igoniwei poured praises on Dr Wilson, describing him as a pillar of support, whose immense love, contributions and empowerment has brought succour and ushered in meaningful development to the community.
On her part, one of the beneficiaries of the canoe, Mrs Rachel Toru who could not contain her joy, explained that having her personal canoe will help ease the burden of transportation and boost her business.
Highlight of the event was the donation of a Toyota Highlander Jeep to Pope Uyabara Yousuo, by the MD of Labrador, Dr Kojo Sam through Dr. Levi for his fight against pipeline vandalism and illegal crude oil bunkering within and around the community over the years.
Dr. Levi encouraged pope Yousuo to do more in combating illegal crude oil bunkering as the coordinator of Labrador Security Outfit in Olugbobiri axis of Southern Ijaw LGA.
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